Four years ago I woke up on this very morning, alone in my apartment in the upper avenues. I looked out over the valley, happy to see blue skies. It was quiet and I was grateful to have a calm and peaceful morning to myself on such an important day. Some people may have thought it strange that I did not have sisters and friends all fussing about me or that I was not going from beauty parlor to make-up artist… all that hype probably would have ruffled my feathers a little more than I could have handled when my nerves were already on end. I reviewed in my mind the importance of such an eternal covenant. I pondered and prayed and sought the preparations necessary for the major changes to come. My focus was quite genuinely on the eternal significance of that day. I am an over thinker and an over planner which means I am also an over worrier at times. Thus, such milestones as making a covenant to spend the eternities with one person were quite heavy on my heart.
It had been a whirlwind of preparations leading to that day. Most of which I just let happen because I didn’t want to get caught up in “the wedding fluff.” I was much better at fulfilling my goal to stay eternally minded that day, but I have since had my setbacks fussing over the petty things. I really was never cut out to be a bride. And I confess that I did not enjoy it and I’m glad to be happily married and know that I will never have to do it again. It was a beautiful day and everything went well but there is no doubt that I would have done some things differently. I would have spoken up more about what I wanted, I would have spent money on the things I found important rather than succumb to the pressures of tradition. I was young and felt all too rushed. The only thing that really got me through it all was that there was no doubt that I loved the man that I was marrying and no doubt that I wanted and needed him in my life.
I do not claim it to be the “Happiest day of my life” but I do indeed feel that because of that day, the happiest days of my life have followed and I imagine will continue. My favorite memory of that day was a continuation of my peaceful morning. I love to reflect upon the time that I sat with my sweetheart in the celestial room of the temple just before we were to go in and greet our family members, and make our final commitment to one another. This was a beautiful and sacred time. Our ceremony and incredible opportunity that we had to receive an Apostolic blessing was an amazing experience and we were grateful to have our dearest friends and family members there to share it with. It was indeed a very special day and I am so grateful to have my dear Nicholas in my life. I am so grateful for the past four years that we have spent learning and growing together. I am grateful for that day four years ago that we committed to each other and I can go forward knowing that we will be side by side forever.
